Terrible Stories #1

Terrible Story #1
Status: Complete


Once upon a time, there was a half eaten piece of garlic bread ordered by a vampire, now looking at his plate in digust unable to remember why he ordered such a thing. He heavily contemplated biting the waitresses head off, but realized she probably tasted like garlic as well and therefore didn’t bite her. But now he was hungry, so what he did next was truly, truly horrifying. He picked his long nose…and ate a booger. “Bah! Garlic again… What is wrong with these people??” Soon after he said that, he died. Figuratively died. Being vampire, he was technically already dead. Soon after, his very, very, very feminine sidekick “Foul Fuwl-ye” arrived. Unfortunately, his side kick died. I want five minutes of my life back.


Original Post:
[Rules for this time: 20 word upper limit per post. 1 post per user, per 2 days. 10 posts per this story. Anyone can start one of these, with diff rules, this isn’t my thing.]

Once upon a time, there was a half eaten piece of garlic bread…

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ordered by a vampire, now looking at his plate in digust unable to remember why he ordered such a thing…

He heavily contemplated biting the waitresses head off, but realized she probably tasted like garlic as well…

and therefore didn’t bite her. But now he was hungry, so what he did next was truly, truly horrifying

He picked his long nose…and ate a booger…

"Bah! Garlic again… What is wrong with these people??
(Rereading this, I may have mis-read rockets contribution as ‘her nose’. eitherway I am standing by this).

Soon after he said that, he died.

(Did I kill it or what?)

Figuratively died. Being vampire, he was technically already dead. Soon after, his very, very, very feminine sidekick “Foul Fuwl-ye” arrived.

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Edit: Err I didn’t know I broke a rule.

[Rules for this time: 20 word upper limit per post. 1 post per user, per 2 days. 10 posts per this story. Anyone can start one of these, with diff rules, this isn’t my thing.]

Everyone please bluntly and ungraciously disregard Wulf’s last post. Foul Fuwl-ye is not dead. Also Foul Fuwl-ye isn’t technically a she. 2 posts to go before the story ends. Exciting.

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Unfortunately, his side kick died.

I want five minutes of my life back.

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no refunds

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Awesome, we got our story!


Once upon a time, there was a half eaten piece of garlic bread ordered by a vampire, now looking at his plate in digust unable to remember why he ordered such a thing. He heavily contemplated biting the waitresses head off, but realized she probably tasted like garlic as well and therefore didn’t bite her. But now he was hungry, so what he did next was truly, truly horrifying. He picked his long nose…and ate a booger. “Bah! Garlic again… What is wrong with these people??” Soon after he said that, he died. Figuratively died. Being vampire, he was technically already dead. Soon after, his very, very, very feminine sidekick “Foul Fuwl-ye” arrived. Unfortunately, his side kick died. I want five minutes of my life back.


Wow, that was actually more terrible than I thought it would be. Can’t wait for the next one.

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I liked it.

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